Good Deeds and Christo

"I really feel like I'm too special to be on the backburner. And I think every girl should feel that way."

You said it sister, you hit it right on the nail. I like the way you talk in your blog. We never talk like that in person, and that's not a bad thing, I really like getting to know you this way. I wish we could hang out more, but our lives only seem to cross paths in drunken stupors or when I'm cranky or stressed out. I'll try harder. My bead "studio" is almost set up and the new episode of Community is due to come out soon.... that means more play dates!

Yesterday was the first day back to my ONE class. It was way better than I had anticipated. I slept the whole bus ride there... I miss traveling with Dr. Nick, it was guaranteed time for me and him to bond. Now I barely see him - it's okay though, we are just on different paths right now, we'll meet up again soon. Anyway, we talked about "boundaries and borders" as places and spaces in between, and how we take them for granted and how they guide our lives without us even noticing. I like looking at the dotted lines on the road... its all I ever do since I don't drive, that and the hydro wires hanging above in the sky, they seem to dance when you drive really fast... We watched a documentary on Christo (ahem... pardon me - Christo and Jeanne-Claude). I'm jealous of his perfect love story life - all its hardships and obstacles wrapped up in one beautiful ball of fabric. Haha, which is exactly what they do if you are unfamiliar with their work. This documentary was on Pont Neuf in Paris - just fantastic.

Next time he does something (because Jeanne-Claude just passed away from a brain aneurism) and its in affordable traveling distance from me, I'M GOING. I wish I would linger on the topics that this class talks about - I have been very inspired by this Prof. I need to let it flow into my artwork a little more. I want there to be something that moves people other than "oh, that's pretty". That's what art is all about isn't? To create a dialogue, to stir up emotions, to describe events, feelings, or things that words cannot? I'm waiting patiently for my time to come... I have a feelings I'm going to burst when it finally stops snowing out and I can utilize my garden and backyard patio. I'm going to paint everyday if I can. I welcome all of you to join me - the _ORTRESS is sooooo easy to find.

Today I did a good deed. It's a bit of a long story to get there so bare with me, but I like how it made me feel, so I think the WHOLE story is necessary. I left my cell phone at Drew's (what else is new?) and found out that my Godfather's mother-in-law passed away. My parents are expected me to attend the viewing and the funeral - which of course! I'd drop my hat to be there in an instant, just like they did when my Mom's father passed away (the saddest day of my life to this day... I am a forever changed person, I can't deny this event as life altering). On top of that my grandmother is in surgery getting her appendix removed (or what was left behind from the last surgery). I have to plan a lot of meeting up with family and rides here and there and figuring out plans - and EMAIL JUST ISN'T CUTTING IT... So I decided to drag my lazy ass out of bed at 10 this morning and head back to Drew's. I mean I could have waited for this evening when Drew and I go to see a movie... mmmmmmm, but I'm trying this new thing called "Being Responsible" (hahahha - but seriously - I need to be more accountable for my actions, or at least that is something that I need to do for my own peace of mind). ANYWAY - so I emailed my dad to let him know of my plans and hopped on the subway. It was a nice quiet ride and I knew if I timed it right, I might get a glimpse of Drew before he headed to work. I got to Yonge Station at 11:08am and thought, "DAMN - I'm going to miss him... oh well, not the end of the world, but it would have been a nice surprise". Davisville Station was surprisingly busy as I tried to battle my way through senior citizens trying to figure out the new tickets and mothers with strollers and the other bustle of people passing through the station. I tried to scan my eyes across the platform for Drew - must have missed him. The walk to the apartment was nice, not a soul on the sidewalk. Just white snow on pretty lawns and little bits falling from the branches above. The park was also empty, no cute French Bulldogs in coats, or Labradors chasing after balls, or toddlers on the swings.... just quiet, empty, serene and peaceful - JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT (hah - what a hermit!). I decided to kick it down a gear and just enjoy it when I see the tell-tale fast-paced walk and head phones over hat of Drew. My face lit up and he stopped dead in his tracks surprised to see me. I walked him back to Davisville as we chatted quickly about our previous days. He has a large bandage on his pinkie finger from an attempt to make breakfast this morning (my poor boy). Just on the edge of the bridge we spot a package on the sidewalk. It was just signed for and picked up at the Post Office, it was a DVD... we both 'aawwwww'd at it and picked it up. Drew was in a rush, so I told him I'd drop it back in the mailbox. We kissed and I turned back toward the apartment. I looked at the address on the package and knew exactly which building it belonged to - AND that's when I decided to take some time to deliver it in person. The building was completely open so I walked right in, but I couldn't find a matching name on the buzzer, so I found a staff worker polishing a mirror in the lobby to verify the address. He was so surprised that I picked it up and walked all the way to the building. "God bless you! I'll bring it up to them right now. Thank you, that's so amazing of you, most people wouldn't have thought twice about what you did." And that put a little smile on my face as I let long strides carry me out the door.

So much so that even though I have my cell phone now, I had to sit down at Drew's computer and blog about it... hahah so I guess I just ruined it by blabbing about it vainly, blabbing about how goooood I am.... MEH - I'm just happy that I feel good and happy about something. I'm going to save a piece of this feeling and tuck it away somewhere safe to remind me that the world isn't SHIT. To remind me that my past is done and gone and only good things can come if I make it happen - if I let it happen...